When I got up I went to the library as I had to fax something and was greeted by the cheeriest librarian I’ve ever met.... He looked like he was about to commit suicide and older man around 50.... "can I help you?" in the most monotone voice I’ve ever heard.... I explained i needed a fax ....He took the document and walked away very slowly towards the fax machine leaving me waiting ... behind the desk there were 2 women talking about "gan tae the hospitull".....
"Am gan tae the hospitull the morra hen" ... "whits the matter ur wi ye hen?" .... "am a awiye in tae get ma ingrowe to nail taken oot hen ... it whent aww green and pussy hen"
At that point the slow guy came back with my fax and I left as quickly so not to here the rest of the lovely story.....on the way out I heard the woman say "it pure stinking" that was me put of eating for a while.
I then went a walk into town through Glasgow Green.... I’ve always wondered what the fascination with Glasgow and the police barriers is... the whole park was covered in them right along the walk way's ...It’s a shame as the park is beautiful when its sunny ...
On the way back I decided to sit on a bench in the park and have some lunch.... It was at that point I seen an old man on a mobility scooter 2 Scottish flags flying at the front covering his face and causing him to nearly go off the path... the scooter looked like it was on the TV series Pimp my ride.... He had a BMW sticker on the front, 2 Scottish flags flapping in his face, a lovely fluffy seat cover and he was wearing sun glasses and a hat that said Ferrari! It was hilarious......
After I got back to the flat I had to go to the library again to print something and to my relief the women where away and so was the boring guy ... Instead was a very helpful guy who was actually happy to be there with no tales that would give you as we say in Glasgow "the dry boke" ie make you sick.
I’m sitting in the flat at the moment and have a new stalker.... I little bird keeps coming in the window and sitting on the table and looking at me it’s very strange.... I chase it away and it comes back that 3 times now lol...So looks like I have a new pet lol....
I just looked out of the window as I heard a woman shouting "am gonna kick yer heed in!.... you think a wulny a wull ya bas***d" ... followed by a man "aye right!" .... "am gonna punch f**k oot eh you!" ...." Moan then!"..., she then slapped him over the face and walked away with the a dog on a leash, leaving the guy just standing there with a look of shock on his face...She then turned arround and through the dogs lead at him and said "oh and heres yer dug back!" the dog then started following her and she shouted at the dog... "go get yer bas**rd of a da!.... go own bugger aff ya poor excuse fur a mutt!" at that point the guy piped up.... "sheila theres nae need tae take it oot on the dug!" ... "shut it ya fu**ing wan*er!" she then walked off with the guy and dog follwing her... all I could here was her screaming "f*ck aff !!" and all sorts of other stuff until the voices faded into the distance.... Who needs East enders?? lol
Ten minutes later.... Boys voice.... "Miiichelle...Chelle" followed by a whistle... "Chelle" Id love to meet this Michelle as thats the name thats always being shouted..... A man’s voice .... "Michelle!!”... I look out and out pops a fat blonde woman’s head from the window...fag in one had baby in the other..."whitt?!" she looked like she was trying to copy Michael Jackson with baby hanging out the window.... Man asks...."Is Tony oot the barell yet!!??" .... "no hes no oot till the mora!.... how?" ... "ah wiz just wondering thats aww hen!".. "tell ye he kin huv his wayne back am sick eh it so ah um ... wee Paris here wulny stope greetin and its dain ma nutt in so it is!" ... "Aye the wayne Shurley-Anne said she saw ye doon the dole affice...shes up the duff as well hen.. she anely 15 am affy proud eh how she’s honuliing it so I um hen" ......"Aye well she will get her aine hoose like a did the cooncil wull help her, Is that Ryan still aroon!?".... "noa hen the boy geed him a good kicking when the fun ooot the wee yin wiz up the duff... he’s staying wi his da in Possil noe days hen"
So already we know....
* Michelle has a baby called Paris and is living in a flat paid by the tax payer, Tony who may be her partner maybe even Paris's father is in Jail.
*Tony gets out of Jail tomorrow.
*Shirley-Anne is 15 and pregnant with Ryan’s baby and is looking for benefits.
*Ryan has been banished to Possil park.
So it’s like a soap opera.... I’m Loving how people have whole conversations at shouting volume and hang out of windows with there baby’s dangling out.... it’s a different world to what I’m used to.. I did live in on a farm before this though and I’ll tell you this much animals are nowhere near is entertaining as the people here are.





















































